When you get together with a group of people who have 20 to nearly 40 years on you, and they universally reassure you that turning 40 is no big deal/fabulous/a relief/easy-peasy, et al., it can offer some reassurance that it is, in fact, no big deal. If you let it.
So, while a small part of my inner dialogue is utterly freaked out about turning 40 - symbolically as well as the literal and figurative aspects of holy years passing by batman, FORTY - the larger part of myself is a little bit excited. Okay, maybe mostly excited by the prospect of eating cake with a fork and drinking wine, I will admit that I am looking forward to that detail element of the actual day.
What do I want out of the symbolism of turning 40, though? I would like more than to flash back to the tv commercials of linda from dynasty reassuring us that she's the best she's ever been. Thanks, Linda.
I would like to embrace the wisdom of en vogue, I think, and free my mind (assuming that the rest will, in fact, follow).
Free my mind - from defeating myself, from shutting myself down, for being the biggest obstable in my own path. Free my mind from the belief that I can't. From the no, nope, uh-uh, squelch, squash, defeat, negative bad.
I'm not a happy person, I get that and I accept it. That does not necessarily preclude the notion of cultivating a wee bit more happy energy in myself.
I will not be a pirate looking at 40.
I would like to be a radical self confident self contained chick looking at 40.
